Orphanism or Belonging?

What is the first thing that comes to mind when you hear orphan?

Probably a child or children without parents right?

Me too!

This past Sunday during service I got thinking about the difference between being an orphan and having an orphanistic mentality. Being an orphan is out of our control but having an orphanistic mentality is not.

Let me explain…when I think of the word orphan, I think of someone being WITHOUT something.

Our church just got done finishing 21 Days of Prayer on Sunday and I was thinking of people using that time to present their worries, desires, needs, and struggles with others and God wanting to receive answers and freedom.

Marriages fail from feeling like an orphan of love and/or respect.

Friendships end from feeling like an orphan of honesty and trust.

Financial struggle comes from feeling like an orphan of having enough stuff.


Having an orphanistic mentality is a decision and usually due to the fact that we look for these things in the wrong places.

Although some may be orphans in the physical, no one is an orphan in the spiritual, emotional, or mental unless they so choose.

From my experience in my short 21 years, I am loved and respected in my marriage because I choose to find my love and respect first in Christ. From there, I now have the power and ability to take that love and respect and transfer it to TJ which allows him the ability to give it in return.

My friendships can remain strong because I learn how to be honest and trustworthy from Jesus’ example.

Our finances remain strong and blessed because I am grateful and content with everything God has given us.

Do not mistake me for perfect or having it all together….I have my “bad, the world is ending” days just like everyone else.

Why? Because no one is perfect and because we all have days where our focus is thrown off by all the things the enemy likes to throw our way.

With everything in life, it is always our choice to let the ball hit us or hit it back at him.

We can never be orphans if we look for our needs in the right place first and then the other areas of our lives will automatically get better.

I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me, I will call on him as long as I live.       -Psalm 116:1-2

And everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.     -Acts 2:21

If you want to feel valued and unique…then find it from the One who made you that way.

And when we feel loved, unique, and valued, others will treat you that way as well because we radiate confidence in ourselves.

So I encourage anyone and everyone, if you feel WITHOUT in any given area, look at who or what you look to for that need to be filled.

An orphan could look at their lack of parents and feel there is no chance for a bright or successful future because the mountain looks to vast for them to make it to the top. Or they look at that mountain and look at its vastness and all its beauty as a great, unknowing, and exciting journey that they will give their best in every step.

I love the song Touch The Sky by Hillsong. The words and the music make me feel like I can overcome anything. The lyrics speak such truth about what life can be when we put it in Gods hands.

“I found my life,

When I laid it down

Upward Falling, Spirit Soaring

I touched the sky

When my knees hit the ground

What treasure waits within your scars

This gift of freedom gold can’t buy

I bought the world and sold my heart

You traded Heaven to have me again

My heart beating, My soul breathing…”

You can choose to be the victor or the victim. It’s life or death. Blessing or cursing. Truth or lies. Fun or misery.

For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.    -Romans 6:23

This day I call the heavens and the earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live        -Deuteronomy 30:19

Let him not deceive himself by trusting what is worthless, for he will get nothing in return.    -Job 15:31

I tell you this so that no one may deceive you by fine-sounding arguments.    -Colossians 2:4

It’s your choice…Orphanism or Belonging? Choose Life!

With Love,



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